Top Ten Rainy Day Songs

Messes of Men - mewithoutyou - Brother, Sister
The Boy Who Destroyed The World - AFI - All Hallows EP
The Funeral - Band of Horses -
I Don't Keep With Liars Anymore - The Bled - Found In The Flood
Eye of the storm - Blindside - About A Burning Fire
Down - Blink 182 - Blink 182
There Is - Box Car Racer - Box Car Racer
November Rain - Guns N' Roses - Use You Illusion
Banana Pancakes - Jack Johnson - In Between Dreams
Helena - My Chemical Romance - Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge

No particular order and subject to change without notice. But seriously, get all these songs and listen to them on a rainy day. This order is actually a really good listening order. Also, as a rainy day go to, put on some Norah Jones. You can't go wrong.

It sucks how you can't choose your personality sometimes. You can definitely make changes to how you act and think, but you can't control what you like or dislike or the things you hold to value. In that area, you kind of have to just hold on and hope that you don't end up doing something idiotic. I have not had much luck in this area I feel. It seems I am always thinking poorly of my past self for making bad decisions. I guess I never put much thought into it, but I never thought I would come to shake my head at the naive younger self I was. I know there are several examples if I wanted to put myself through thinking about it but one example has come up recently. I was going through a box of random stuff when I came across my graduation cap from high school. I had painted a "straight edge" symbol on the top. It's not that big of a deal... but that the heck!? Why did I think it would be cool to advertise a moral code way of life based in the underground punk scene? If you would have asked me if I was straight edge I would have said, "no, but I don't drink, do drugs, or have pre-marital sex anyway". I just thought it would be cool for some reason. What a dork.

Anyway, it's things like that that make me afraid to do anything for fear that I'll regret it later. It's a weird concept to think about things before you do them with the intention to evaluate how long you thing this particular thing will be cool to you. I think doing this would automatically make it uncool. I guess you just have to go for it, do what you know is right, and don't dwell in the past. I just wish I could see my future self so that I know what he'd approve of me doing now.

On another subject, but something that I'll probably shake my head at myself later for, I built a ski rail out of wood and PVC. I watched a couple youtube videos of people making similar rails, drew up some plans, and built it with my dad. It's pretty sweet looking, but I have yet to use it. It requires a trip up the mountain with my dad's truck to bring down a bed full of snow. I haven't had this kind of time recently and so it sits taunting me. I might not get to hit it until next winter and this makes me sad. I'm in such a panic to get better at skiing that I feel like every moment I'm not doing something to progress is a waste I can't afford. Also, youtube videos pump me up and crush me at the same time. It is very emotional.

The Logic of Crocodiles

Hello blog people.

This blog is about a few things.
1. I've seen a few good movies as of late and I felt it was blog worthy to write about them. One of the movies was Yes Man. I wasn't sure if it would be as funny as Carey's previous movies, but it did not disappoint. I think I was crying when they were at the chicken slaughter house. I also just watched The Thirteenth Floor. This is one of my favorite movies. It's like a sci-fi who done it with a butt-load of moral tension. If you have not seen either of these movies then I suggest you plan in a good block of nothing into your schedule and rent both.

2. I have been exercising with the wife lately. We've been walking a lot. We run this block by our house which is one mile exactly but with some slight inclination change-ups. There really is no point here, I just thought it should be recorded and documented somewhere.

3. I have started listening to Every Time I Die a lot again lately and not sure why I stopped for so long. It's probably because that's all I listened to in Arizona. They are however exquisite. It is just really fun music all around. Check out this video... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MivClrvXCpM.
And then check this out... http://www.songmeanings.net/songs/view/82106/

4. I think one of the worst things about sin is those painful bumps that you get on your tongue. I bet before sin they didn't get those. What the heck are they anyway. If you know please let me know. If I could avoid getting them I would do all I could.

5. I'm seeing Death Cab tonight and it should make for quite a delightful evening.

Peace

Prospective pries her once weighty eyes and it gives you wings

So I've recently had a change of heart. I've decided that I want to pursue a career in skiing. It might be ridiculous, stupid, unattainable, and it definitely scares the crap out of me, but that's what's been on my mind and in my heart lately. I will always have a love for music and will continue to wish I was playing in a band. I will even try to get jobs that have to do with the audio education I am in debt for while trying to pursue this new passion. It's actually not even new. I've always had a passion for skiing. For some reason I just didn't pursue it like I should have. I should be skiing pro by now but I wasted time doing I don't know what and now I have to make up for lost time. I will need to hit the gym pretty hard all summer and ski as much as I can next winter. I really want to go to this freestyle summer camp but it is a little out of price range at the moment. What's really awesome is that my wife doesn't hate me for coming to this realization after spending so much time and money going to school. She actually is very supportive. This is all very sudden but I am determined. I think the moral here is that when you have a passion in your life or something that you're good at, pursue it and make it your life no matter what. Part of the reason I never pursued skiing as a serious career is that I thought that it wasn't acceptable. I thought people would think I was being a bum and wasting my life. That was a huge mistake. Don't let people decide what your life should look like. Anyway, check out a little Marmot terrain park session I did the other day. It's nothing awesome but I feel good about it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QeJxl52oro

Then check out the level I'm trying to get to. I have a bit of work to do. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U8edWI-ocbA

This video almost alone has inspired me to do this. The skier is Sammy Carlson and he's like 2 or 3 years younger than me. He gets free gear and paid to travel around and do awesome stuff like this. It pumps me up more than anything.

Cold and all alone

Have you seen the movie Into the Wild? If you haven't then you probably should. It's pretty darn good. Anyway, a major theme of the movie is basically that it's really hard to be happy when you're all alone. Of course there are times when alone time is good and needed, but if you're alone too much you lose sight of what happiness even is. Where's your inspiration or what do you have to compare your happiness with. I don't want to ruin the movie, but the last thing that the character writes in his journal is: "Happiness only real when shared".
I think I've experienced a little of this these past few weeks. My wife and I have a pretty busy schedule which allows about 45 minutes to an hour on weeknights, and about half the weekend to actually spend time together. The worst part though has been Fridays. Friday is the only day where I actually have free time during the day all to myself before I go to work at night (right as Rach gets off). Therefore Friday has become my ski day. I could probably put effort into it and find someone to ski with, but I always end up skiing by myself. Besides being a little dangerous, it's just not as fun as it could be. Take for instance today. Today was one of the best days in my skiing career. I have had a hard time getting myself to slide rails and today I was hitting them with a high success rate. I was also hitting a big jump that a lot of people were sitting above and talking about being scared to hit. Not only did the accomplishments make it a good day, but it was just an all around good ski day. Like boosting out of my favorite natural cliff quarter pipe, and cutting through the trees and stuff. It was sunny and everything; just a perfect day. It was perfect except for the fact that I enjoyed it all by myself. It put a huge damper on it and I think it's because of the aforementioned philosophy.
Sorry for the bummer blog. Even the title contains so much pain in so many different ways. I'm really not that depressed (I don't think). I just want someone to ski with.

Colors

So it turns out I like metal. My musical taste has been slowly growing in the direction of harder music. There has always been a place in my heart for harder music, but it was often suppressed for some reason. Since I didn't have a reason I decided to open my mind and explore the harder side of things. It started with The Used and Story of the Year. I liked the combination of screaming and catchy pop rock music that I was used to. Then I started playing music with Tim, Kiko, and Dan in a hardcore band. At the time I just really wanted to play music no matter what it was. Soon I acquired a respect and growing interest for hardcore music. It went beyond just screaming set to catchy and simple music. Within the genre of hardcore and metal there is so much room for creativity and experimenting. I recently purchased a CD by a band named Between the Buried and Me and it is a perfect example of this. The CD is called Colors, contains eight tracks, and is just over an hour long. Each song flows right into the next in an amazing way so it feels like one long performance which embarks on an epic adventure of intricate instrument work, crazy time changes, and rolling hills of intense growls and soothing tunes. The first track starts off nice and easy with piano and verby vocals. Soon there is a choir of harmony and then into string enhanced speed metal. Track two is filled with pinch harmonics, which I love, as well as a good array of snappy time changes. There is also a guitar part that reminds me of Super Mario. Then into track three we find this awesome tom driven Arabian scale guitar riff. I have no idea how they did it, but track three and four are linked with in insane drum fill. Track four ingeniously brakes down into a sweet, smooth jam. Then back up to speed when track four and five are linked with an incredible guitar flail. Track five has this marching pirate feel. It then brakes down into a laid back bluesy jam before going into a hillbilly jig, then back to the pirate theme. Track six is all about dueling guitars. It also has an accordion part and has a great dynamic between the tones of the two vocalists. Track seven is smooth sailing with really present guitar tones that sound like the guitarists are playing right next to you. Plus the bass player is off the hizzy. Then track eight kicks off with fist pumping chugging. Only to go into insane time changes and some brief math metal moments. Towards the end there is some guitar soloing that puts Dragonforce to shame. The track and thus the CD poetically finshes with a peaceful piano line.

Seriously, if you appreciate or like music at all you have to listen to this CD from start to finish. And if you don't, you will after you hear this. It is also really good skiing soundtrack.

I can now face the day on legal speed (The American way)

In the past when decaf was mentioned I would scoff at the idea. Why did it even exist? It made no sense to me. Now I realize that they had to make decaf because people like me got very addicted or they knew that people like me would get very addicted. I became addicted in every sense of the word. A craving turned into a "need" every day just to not feel tired. And after every cup I felt so good. Maybe caffeine effects me a little more than average, but it definitely feels like a drug to me. When I didn't get a cup for the day I would get a headache. The other day I got the worst headache of my life and it inspired this blog. It's just kinda screwed up. I don't condone or even like the idea of marijuana, but why is one drug illegal and the other not? It just really doesn't make sense. The inconsistency of our society is incredible. I can say that if coffee was illegal I probably would not have started drinking it, but what it really comes down to is our sinful nature and making choices. I knew what caffeine was capable of before I ever took a sip but I still fell into the addiction. Making things legal or illegal isn't the solution. Inward discernment, constant prayer, and taking every thought captive ought to be our daily guidance. Too bad that wouldn't go over well in today's society.

Just one of those days.

Do you ever have those days where you realize where God has put you and that your life is pretty darn awesome. It usually comes around after you've been stewing about how your life is stuck in a rut and will never go where you want it to. I've been essentially trying to work three jobs. I work as a ski instructor three days a week, a prep cook at Michael's Four nights a week, and I try to intern at RadioStar Studios as much as possible any other time I have, which isn't much. This schedule can get daunting at times, but the other day I really thought about it, and those are all really awesome things. I would be blessed to do one of them, but God allowed me to do all three. Not to say that I am content to keep this schedule forever, but this is not too shabby of a temporary plan. All I'm saying is God's got your back. No matter what. And that is neat.